27 de septiembre de 2011

I’ve discussed before how it’s important to support those you love and to ask for the same support in return. But, I also think that in order to support someone emotionally, you have to believe in them. And it can sometimes be difficult to truly believe in someone if you don’t agree with them.
Make sure your special someone knows that you believe in them, no matter what. It can be a small but important distinction for them to know that you’re behind them 100 percent. Standing behind someone is a great way to show them you care.

24 de septiembre de 2011

It’s insanely difficult to know when you should leave a relationship if no one has really done anything outright to warrant it. If no one has cheated or been abusive, when do you know when enough is enough? For me, it’s when I know I just don’t want to try anymore, and that is saying a lot. I firmly believe that every relationship you have, even the one with your mom or dad, takes some work from both parties. So, when I get to the point with someone that I just can’t do the work anymore, that’s when I know it’s time to move on. It’s such a sad realization, and it’s incredibly difficult to do.

21 de septiembre de 2011

Being in love makes everything better. The grass is greener, the sky is bluer, and the air seems crisper. There’s something about being in love that makes everything seem so much more beautiful. You’re able to see stars shining brighter. Clouds seem to take on more shapes.
It can always be so easy to see the darkness and bad in the world, but when you’re in love, you’re more apt to see the good instead. Make sure to hold onto this beauty because seeing the world in rose-colored glasses is so much more relaxing and beautiful than focusing on the bad and cynical. Even if you’re not in love right now, try to look at the world this way so that you’re more open to the idea of falling in love. It’s much easier than outright mistrusting everyone and everything. People will respond to sunniness better any day. Plus, flowers and kittens and stars area always sights to behold, so never let your cynicism overshadow that!

18 de septiembre de 2011

How do you know when you’re in love and it’s not just infatuation? For me, I get this fluttery feeling in my chest when I see them. It’s almost as if my heart is bursting out of my chest. But falling in love with someone is much more than just an intense attraction or having fun with them.
When I’m falling in love, I can’t stop smiling when I’m around them, but I also have no problem being myself. That’s the moment when I know I’m in love with someone—I just relax and stop trying to put forth my good side. I know that I can just truly be me without worrying that they’ll run for the hills. It’s the moment when I let down my guard and show them some of my baggage because I know I can trust them enough to share it with them.
Being in love is much more than just roses and romantic dates—it’s allowing someone through the walls you’ve built around yourself and letting them see the real you. It’s not about pretending to be someone who’s constantly fun and laidback. It’s about showing that you’re a real person with neuroses, and knowing that they’ll love you for the whole package—not just your good sides. When I have this faith in someone, it’s how I know that my heart is going pitter patter for a reason. It’s because I’m in love.

16 de septiembre de 2011

There is nothing more devastating than losing the one you love. It is the most heart-wrenching thing in the world, and no words can accurately describe how much pain your heart will feel. You will feel like someone is pushing down on your chest and find it difficult to breathe. Your heart will hurt for a long time. Nothing can prepare you for this feeling, and it’s a sad fact of life that you will most likely feel this awful pain at some point in your life.
But realize that your heart will go on. You will love again, and you will be loved again. It’s difficult to see this when you’re heartbroken. It’s impossible to see the light at the end of the tunnel. You don’t feel like you’ll ever get there again—that there is no one else in the world for you to love. There is. You can get through the pain and the sadness.
Trust me. I’ve been there, and I’ve loved again. It sucks to hear people say, “everything happens for a reason” because you don’t want to believe there is a reason to feel all this pain. But believe me when I say this: you will love again because giving your heart to someone is the most precious gift you can give. Sometimes that person doesn’t deserve to hold your heart in their hands, and sometimes that person will protect your heart with the respect and love it so desperately deserves. Even though it seems impossible, you will be loved again.

15 de septiembre de 2011

They always say that you never forget your first love. Sure, that person may or not be your greatest love, but you will never forget the person one who made your heart go pitter-patter in your chest. Maybe it happened on the playground or in the cafeteria. Or maybe you felt fireworks when meeting a stranger for the first time. No matter how you met, what your courtship was like, or how it ended, your first love will stick with you forever.
And if you don’t end up with your first love, you can still think of that relationship fondly because it was the first one where you opened yourself up to loving someone, and that’s a beautiful thing. So whether you’re still with your first love, have found the love of your life, or are still looking, take a moment to think back to when you first gave a piece of your heart away and cherish that time.

12 de septiembre de 2011

Telling someone you love them for the first time can be a little scary. You don’t know if they feel the same way you do, and you don’t want to feel like a fool for saying it before they did. But, as terrifying as it can be, telling someone you love them is also the most exhilarating moment. It puts the words to the pounding you feel in your chest. It feels almost as if you don’t tell them that you love them that your heart might burst out of your chest.
I’m a fairly cautious person, but when it comes to love I often throw caution to the wind. Being in love and feeling loved is the best feeling in the world. It’s been said that the greatest thing is loving someone and being loved in return. So, no matter how scary it might be to go out on a limb and offer your heart on a silver platter to someone, it could also be one of the greatest things you’ll ever do.

9 de septiembre de 2011

Love is so hard to define sometimes because it means so many different things to everyone. The type of love you feel for your mom is definitely different than the love you have for your significant other and so on and so on. There’s also a huge difference between a new love that comes with a pounding heart and sweaty palms and a longer love that is comfortable and kind.
So how do you define love? For me it’s a combination of things. It means being selfless and putting the other person before my own needs. It means wanting to make them happy, not because of personal gain but because seeing them smile is the ultimate goal. Love means that just being in their presence makes my day better, that quiet moments speak volumes of love and understanding. It means that I try to look from their perspective, no matter how much I might disagree with them. It means being kind and compassionate. It means loving them because I don’t know how else to live my life without doing so

8 de septiembre de 2011

Sometimes when you love someone, there is a moment when you’re gonna have to give them some tough love. Whether it’s your best friend who’s hung up on her ex for far too long or a significant other who needs help kicking a bad habit—chances are you will have to, at some point, roll up your sleeves and dish out some not particularly fun kind of love: tough love.
It’s not easy to be tough on the ones we love. You want to protect your loved ones at all cost, but sometimes you just can’t. Sometimes they have to touch the stove to know it’s hot. It’s also a fine line between knowing when to help and rescue someone and when to instill some tough love. Make sure to take a moment when you’re helping out your loved one and consider if you’re enabling them or helping them because that makes all the difference in the world. Also know when your tough love isn’t enough and your loved one needs help of a professional. Drug addictions cannot be kicked with just tough love alone.
Know that being strong enough to help someone you love in their time of need is an admirable trait. Being selfless and compassionate are great qualities to have in any relationship. Just remember that when the time comes for tough love to do it with an air of understanding and not of judgment. It could be the kindest thing you’ll ever do for your loved one.

6 de septiembre de 2011

It’s easy to talk about romantic love—there are so many poems and movies on the subject that it’s hard to ignore sometimes. But sometimes platonic love can get overlooked. While being IN love is great and all-encompassing, there is also something so incredibly wonderful about the love of a true friend. For men it can be easy for them to bond over video games, football, and beer, but women have a harder time making great female friendships last, it seems.
I see all my female friends practically disappear when they get into a relationship, and it’s sad to watch them slip away.  While I love my boyfriend and he’s often my best friend, I sometimes yearn for the companionship of my friends. There’s something that a female friendship has that a romantic one doesn’t. Maybe, it’s the whole “men are from Mars” mantra, but women just connect with each other in way’s they cannot connect with their male significant others (and vice versa for men and their own friendships).
It’s often said that men bond over activities and women bond over talking, and this type of friendship is helpful for everyone involved. When I am able to discuss my feelings with my lady friends, I feel less of a burden onto my boyfriend for emotional support. He does a great job, but no woman is an island. We need more than the support of one person, and female friendships really help to balance a lady out.
So if you haven’t seen your friends in a while, call ‘em up. Tell them you miss them and love them. Love doesn’t always have to mean roses and romance—it’s also in the bonds you have with your closest friends, and you should always strive to keep those bonds thriving.

5 de septiembre de 2011

It can sometimes be difficult to maintain a long-term loving relationship. There are days they will drive you nuts, and there are days where they will pull away from you. You can’t physically keep someone from leaving your relationship, but you can improve it and try to reconnect to your partner in little ways.
You may think that throwing a lot of money or romance at the situation is the best medicine, but sometimes that can greatly backfire. The best way to make sure your relationship continues to grow and blossom is by actively making the effort every day. When you wake up in the morning, instead of letting your mind drift to frustrations or stress, think of one reason why you love your significant other. It doesn’t have to be major—something small will equally suffice. You don’t even have to tell them (although it wouldn’t hurt to do so occasionally). But just thinking about reasons why you love your partner will open you up each and every day to them.
You also must be patient and understanding. Try to see their qualms from their point of view. Instead of having a monocular view, try to have binocular one. This means being able to understand to understand why they’re feeling what they are. Once you shift your focus from just thinking of yourself, you can focus on thinking about your partner and your relationship as a whole.
Be affectionate. Touch your partner in non-sexual ways. Snuggle on the couch when watching TV, hold their hands, or simply hug them. You can really soothe many issues with really comforting and safe body contact.
Sometimes it’s easy to forget that love takes work. It’s like a precious flower that must live in the right soil and get the right amount of sun in order to grow and flourish. Make sure you take the time to enable your love and relationship to continue to grow.

4 de septiembre de 2011

Je t’aime

Love isn’t about finding the “perfect” person. No one is perfect in this world, but there are people who are perfect for you, and it’s all about trying to find someone who can love you with all of your imperfections.
But sometimes it’s not enough just to tolerate someone’s weird quirks. You really, truly have to embrace them and accept the whole package. My boyfriend knows that I will get irrationally angry when I’m super hungry. Instead of letting it bother him when I rage at him for no reason other than because I’m starving, he merely pops open his backpack and casually slides me a granola bar. It is the little things like this that make me more patient and understanding when he’s running late for the umpteenth time, which threatens my hyper punctual nature.
So, remember there is no such thing as a perfect man or woman. Everyone comes with their own little oddities that will drive you nuts sometimes, but it’s all about learning to accept them and loving the person as a complete picture. Because no beautiful work of art is completely flawless—and neither is love

3 de septiembre de 2011

So your boyfriend or girlfriend just dumped you? Stings, doesn’t it? While it can take you months (and sometimes years) to get over them completely, there are small things you can do TODAY to help you cope just a little bit easier.
Identify your triggers for missing your ex. Typically you’ll start obsessing over them in specific instances, such as listening to “your” song or eating at your favorite restaurant. Other times it’s something as seeming harmless as Facebook. Now is the time to remove them completely from your social networks because anytime you see their name pop up, it will sting. It will hurt to know that they are going out and having a great time while you’re at home crying into a pint of ice cream. So, your first step when your breakup is fresh is to remove these triggers from your day.
Secondly, invoke the 30-minute rule. When you feel like calling, emailing, or texting your ex, do something to occupy your time for 30 minutes. Chances are you will be less inclined to call or text them once you’ve thought about something else for a bit. Go for a run, read a book, cook yourself dinner—whatever you can do to think about something else instead of obsessing over your ex will make you feel better.
Make a list of why you’re better off without them. Yeah, this might be hard at first, but truly think of reasons why it was never going to work out anyway.
Create distractions. Call up your chattiest friend or make plans. Don’t turn down any invitations. Your instinct is to just sit at home and wallow, but if you get out into the world, you can feel better NOW even if it’s just a little bit.

1 de septiembre de 2011

If you’re going through a breakup, you might be feeling like the pain and rejection might never go away. It’s hard to get over someone you love, but did you know that your brain is really reacting to the same chemical response that a cocaine addict feels during a withdrawal?
So the next time someone tells you to get over your heartbreak or to move on quicker, let them know that your head and your heart are merely reacting to the loss appropriately. But make sure you take time to take care of yourself and move on from your breakup in the healthiest way possible.